Conflicted Purpii

Well, on Saturday, the Dungan's arrived back home from their journey to the deep South. All in all, it was a pretty good trip. For me, I must admit I was a little bit disappointed. I was buried with work and had little time to focus on family. This also meant that I had less time to spend focusing on the kiddos.

Don't get me wrong. I know I am lucky. With my flexible schedule, I generally get to spend far more time with my kiddos than most. However, with owning my own business and running the foundation there aren't really any days off. For most of what we do, if I am not doing it, it isn't getting done. At times of the year like this, when I should be spending more time with my family, I find myself being pulled in a hundred other directions.

I love doing the cookbook - talking with families, collecting the recipes, correcting them, formatting them, adding pictures, running the contests, making sure the winners get their prizes, lining out the printer, setting up shipping, and just about anything else you can think of as it relates to getting the cookbook out the door. But again, it is a lot of work, and when it comes down to it, if I don't do it, it doesn't get done. Therefore my November, and my Thanksgiving are often buried in recipes.

Again, I like it. However, I just miss being able to focus on my kiddos when they are having so much fun. I know that when I am finished - when the cookbook sales are completed, the Lunch for a Cure fundraiser has broken its million dollar mark, and we have a big fat check to hand over to the neuroblastoma researchers -that there is nothing that will feel better than knowing that there are real lives of children with neuroblastoma that we have saved. There will be an overwhelming feeling of accomplishment.

We will have made a huge difference. There will be children out there, ones that would have lost their battle - living - and it will all be because of all of our hard work.

I know it is all worth it. I know it is important. I just need to remind myself of that when I see my kiddos out the window having a blast - without me.

It can be hard when your purpii conflict.